To be the person you are has taken a journey. Not just your own, but those who came before you.  When we look into the stories of our forebears, we discover all kinds of things that have got us to where we are today.  And not all things are good. We can discover sadness, unfulfilled lives, tragedy, and worse.  But all of those things have led to you being the person you are. 
Let me tell you about my grandfather.  He was an airman in the Royal Flying Corp in the first world war. Shot down over Belgium, he was a prisoner of war and my father was born while he was a prisoner. When the war ended, the family returned to Canada and made their lives there. My grandfather was an adventurer, a tryer, a grafter. His father - my great-grandfather - had left the family when he was 11. In those days, raising a family without a husband was a real challenge, and my grandfather grew up not knowing where his father was. It gave him that determination to succeed,and made him into a devoted father himself.  Now, all these years later, I am making the journey to Chicago to put a marker on my great-grandfather's grave.  Unmarked all of the years since he died in 1910, we finally tracked down his grave and the time has come to mark the grave for future generations.  Why bother? He, after all, deserted my great grandmother and left her to raise 3 children alone. She bore the brunt of raising the family, and deserves recognition too. But, without him, none of our family would exist. So I thank him for turning my grandfather into someone who was brave and strong, and for giving us life.
We can choose to be held back by negative things that happen to us. We can give up and use failure as an excuse to stop trying. We can find reasons not to persevere when the going gets tough. Or we can choose not to be defined by the things that happen. We can focus on the future possibilities and strive to achieve our very best. You choose.